Disclaimer: The opinions expressed within this column are those of the participants and the moderator, and do not neccessarily reflect those of the GIA. There is coarse language and potentially offensive material afoot. You're blocking my view, dammit. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Would you buy the Chrono Trigger revision for the Playstation? It seems that most would. In fact, that's the topic of today's column. Fancy that.

In the words of an understated and wise old man, "You are correct, sir." The distinction is certainly there, as the differences between a true remake and a true port are substantial. However, like so many other words which have come to lose their ultimate meaning over time, most have come to use the two terms interchangeably.

But allow me to play Devil's advocate for a moment. While it could be argued that the actual game engine and in-game graphics haven't been altered, and hence the game is merely a port, the addition of anime cutscenes do make the PSX version different from the SNES version. If only in that respect. To be a port to the most minute definition of the word would entail that the game be completely unaltered in any shape, form or fashion. And that isn't the case thanks to those fancy ol' anime clips.

Whether you'd consider the PSX Chrono Trigger to be a port or a remake, I leave to your own discernment. Both conditions could be effectively argued in favor of.

Getting back to the subject at hand, PSX CT will have but a paltry 20 minutes of anime, so I guess you'll be disappointed on that front. As for any extras or additions, there is an exclusive Playstation ending to be tracked down, as well as an omake mode, the contents of which remain unknown at this point.

I can understand purchasing the game simply because you want to see the anime cutscenes which Mister Toriyama has crafted for the PSX version of it, but I have to be honest. What the hell is the point of purchasing a game which you already own when there's absolutely nothing new or original about it, making it somehow distinctive? I'll never understand what compels people to buy the same games repeatedly simply because of the name on the jewel case.

But, then, it seems to work for the Tomb Raider series. I guess there's certain things we're not meant to understand.

Yes, anime Magus, you've got to love that. I'm surprised that he didn't receive his own 5 part anime series over in Japan. Every brooding, melodramatic anti-hero deserves at least that. Frog can stay a filthy little slimeball to the end of eternity for all that I care. Missing out on the 5 whole seconds in which you get to see Frog as a rather effeminate human is a small price to pay in exchange for having Magus join your party.

The only thing that keeps Magus from transcending to the upper-echelon of ubercoolness is that intensely obtrusive and rather idiotic-looking chastity belt thing that he wears. I just don't think that any of the lady-folk are going to be so overzealous in their attempts to jump his bones that the metal briefs are necessery. The outside-of-the-pants thing he's got going on just doesn't help the matter any.

Oh, by the way, I don't have a dog named Snuffles. You must be thinking of my next-door neighbors -- which would certainly explain all of the sirens that I heard outside of my window late last night. If you're going to wax a man's family, you should at least get his address straight. However, you still managed to inconvenience me; it was hell trying to get some sleep thanks to all of those sirens and flashing lights, courtesy of the myriad of patrol cars lining my street. I suppose most people would have gone outside to see what was going on, but fresh air just makes my skin crawl.

I can't tell you how relieved Square, Inc. was to find that you were willing to let them commense the creation of a Chrono Trigger game for the Playstation game console. It would seem that their attempts to appease your many fetishes have paid off, as you've given them the go-ahead on this project. Don't worry, I'm not allowed to mention your depraved sexual preferences in the column; it's part of my contract as the Official Undercover Operative. My contract also states that I must refer to the PSX as the "Playstation game console" when speaking on behalf of Square.

Sarcasm aside, there are some who, believe it or not, never played the original Chrono Trigger. By releasing a newer version with a little bit of eye candy to appease those jaded of eye, it opens the experience up to hundreds of newer fans of the genre who otherwise would never have played the game. And should the quality speak for itself to such people, making the release a success, Square will have proven yet again that there's good money to be made by releasing RPGs in the West. And that could only be a good thing.

That certainly seems to be the popular opinion amongst the RPG community. Personally, I'd buy it, assuming that I actually had the money with which to purchase it. And, sadly, thanks to living the college life, that's a pretty large assumption. My life has become a living eCampus commercial. If it weren't for Maruchan, I would've starved to death by now. You know that you must be broke when you catch yourself envying the ease of life which drug dealers and pimps must surely enjoy.

That is a valid concern that you've pointed out, Santy. However, I'd like to think that Square is more than capable of working around the obvious problems inherent in a customizeable party like that which Chrono Trigger allows. Especially the case after the incident with Chrono. After all, they did it quite effectively with Final Fantasy VIII, and FFVII to a lesser extent. Quite honestly, I doubt that they'd make it so that Chrono Trigger forces you to take certain party members along for the anime cutscene which is coming up to feature the correct characters.

I'll have to wait to see what the specifics are before I can make my own judgement. As things stand, however, I'm not sure I like the whole idea myself. For one thing, the area in which I live doesn't have a single cable modem provider, so should the PS2 require a cable modem pre-installed in your home, people like me are out of luck. I'd like to think that sooner or later online gaming will become as integral a part of console gaming as it is for PC gaming, but I just don't think that the technology is ready for that as of yet. I could be wrong, however. It's going to be interesting to see how Sega handles things; having the actual hardware needed to connect built into ths system is a different situation from what we've seen in the past. If Sega can find a way to keep lag times down, they may just stand a chance of making this work.

Closing Comments

That last letter brings me to tomorrow's topic. What, in your opinion, would it take for online gaming to become as accepted a forum with console owners as it already is with the PC gaming crowd? That's it for me today; I'm off to catch a few of those elusive Z's. See you tomorrow.

-Drew Cosner