Double Agent
Huh? Just a box - May 21, 2001 - Nich Maragos

Disclaimer: The opinions expressed within this column are those of the participants and the moderator, and do not necessarily reflect those of the GIA. There is coarse language and potentially offensive material afoot. That jewel just begs to light up. Don't say we didn't warn you.

Well, looks like I spoke too soon yesterday about the GameCube pricing. It did seem too good to be true, but this is one of those times when I'm perfectly okay with being wrong. Between a $200 GameCube and what will likely be a $250 PS2, I wouldn't want to be in Microsoft's position right now. Especially after letters like these.

This does not bode well
You're asking what we, the gaming public, think of the X-Box?

*Laughs uncontrollably for twenty minutes*

...*Snort*......*tee-hee*....Ohhhh my. Seriously though, I think the only reason most of us will pay any attention to the evolution of the X-Box will be to see it crash and burn when it emerges from it's cocoon as a beautiful disaster. Bill Gates is not a well-loved figure, and this thing had NO GAMES to show at E3. From the coverage, the only thing the X-Box seems to be good for is an ugly paperweight.

Unless they straighten their act out, the GameCube is gonna spank this baby like a red-headed stepchild.

-Negative Creep

I was a supporter of the Xbox for a long time. I disliked the PS2, hated the way it somehow convinced everyone as the system to buy over Dreamcast, and looked forward to MS thrashing Sony at E3. And then I actually got there, and wondered what the hell I was thinking. I looked at Sony's booth and saw all of their good or great games all in one place, and there were more of them than I had previously realized. In contrast, I couldn't even bring myself to enter MS's booth after seeing their press materials and game catalog.

What I think I'm trying to say is, I own a Wonderswan Color and I don't plan on buying an Xbox.

The alternative audience
Nich,

In a word? Unimpressive.

Everybody knew what Microsoft had to do to make a big splash at E3: present finished hardware, a nice controller, a bunch of new, surprise games, and playable demos that had people lining up. And yet none of this happened.

The games were running on incomplete, pieced-together hardware. They crashed.

Few new titles were announced, and those that were were either unpopular franchises or ports.

The controller has been described as a "brick."

Everyone that Microsoft thought was going to be drooling over Halo was lined up for two hours to play Luigi's Mansion.

In short, Microsoft has continued their long tradition of great press conferences and shitty product. I'd write more but MSIE just crashed.

-Chris Kohler

Actually, I doubt that the Halo fans were the same ones in the Luigi's Mansion lines. I know it's hard to remember sometimes, here at the GIA, but there are lots of people who enjoy PC games and are looking forward to the Xbox delivering that sort of experience on a console. Then again, a huge-selling PC game means 10,000 or so copies, so good luck to Microsoft finding success with those guys.

Clueless
Dear Nich:  

Time to justify my rant on Saturday. According to USA Today, E3's "...biggest splash came from Microsoft's Xbox system." If by splash they meant "item of mockery" I suppose that's true. They then go on to quote an "industry analysist" who states that "...with the GameCube they showed more traditional-type games." Yeah. I was just saying to myself the other day, "If I play one more damned ghost-vacuuming game or title where the object is to round up and command hundreds of ant-like creators in a vivid backyard setting, I'm going to puke."  

So, like, case in point and stuff.  

-Drew

You know, around the PS2's launch there may have been quotes like "It's historic, a mass-market appliance that fundamentally changes society in the way the printing press did," but at least they came from the actual president of an actual established game development firm. Attributing nonsense like that to an anonymous "industry analyst" is just sad.

Like a rolling stone
Yo Nich,

I've always bought Microsoft products for my computer, whether it be the OS or something like Word.  The only reason is that there's nothing else that I can get for a reasonable price that's competitive.  I deal with it because I have to.  However, I foresee MS having a horrible time with the Xbox.  With all things computer, they were ahead of their competition by lightyears, and were able to steal from or crush those that would challenge them.  In the videogame world, they're the newbie, and all they've done so far is steal from others.  Just look at the controller.  If the leaked price of the Gamecube is correct, that means that the Xbox will be the most expensive hardware come launch.  Will anyone want a system that costs the most, with few recognizable characters or franchises?  My guess is no.  The press won't even feign interest, except for the mainsteam stuff like Time and Newsweek who will ogle at the numbers and get confused by the actual politics of videogame launches.  

And I didn't even mention MS trying to launch the thing in Japan (where the Game Cube will have an established lead by then)...

-The Steve

Actually, I tend to use Microsoft PC products as well. But not because I have to--because I find them legitimately better than the competition. IE is better at page handling than Netscape, Outlook is easier to use than Eudora, and so forth.

I didn't always feel this way. There was a time when I would rather have sold my computer and live a net-less existence than use IE over Netscape, or any of MS's products. The way Microsoft has always worked, though, is to enter the market with an iffy product and slowly improve to the point where their ability can't be faulted. Whether this will happen for the Xbox, I don't know--this is a console, not a PC, and they are Americans in a Japanese-dominated field, after all. But there may be hope yet.

Exclusivity
Before today, I thought the Microsoft X-Box was certain to become the next 3DO, Jaguar, and CD-i. Hey, it might have taken TWO F--KING YEARS but we finally see ACTUAL GAMECUBE GAMES and Nintendo's lineup looks awesome.

However, I remembered the X-Box is getting exclusive versions of Tony Hawk's Pro Skater and Metal Gear Solid 2, but I saw in today's GIA headlines Dino Crisis 3 is X-BOX only. Good move! I think there might be some life in the system yet. Now all they need are a Super Mario 64-quality Malice and Square developing...

-Nagisa Oshima

It's probably more to do with my own narrow preferences in games than the quality of the Xbox-exclusive titles, but none of them do much for me. Dino Crisis has always seemed like the weakest of Mikami's efforts (which is saying something) and DOA has been trying to play catch-up to Soul Calibur and Tekken since the series started.

And how exclusive are they really? It's already known that Metal Gear Solid on Xbox isn't going to be a port of the PS2 game, but something different--just what that "something" is, nobody knows. Jet Set Radio Future is decidedly non-exclusive, as Smilebit made a point of letting everyone know.

On the other hand, there is that Matrix game. Hope Shiny comes through on that one ...

Use only as directed
Two "computer l33+" guys I know are buying Xboxes, in fact, one of them is buying 2. But they are buying them because they can hack them and turn them into fairly cheap yet decently powerful computers to supplement their expensive systems they already built.

They are Nintendo whores, but I find it kind of gratifying that they are going to try and take advantage of microsoft that way. That's about the only use I can see for the Xbox, except for the DVD player, which may be better than PS2 DVD player.

-SSJPabs, who hooked one of them onto DOA2:Hardcore two days ago and is convinced "Jesus" lives in a little black box with the Playstation logo on it. (Yes, I'm going to hell)

I'd certainly hope that the Xbox DVD player will be a sight to behold, since it's now going to be a separate package from the main system, which means a DVD-playing cost over and above the $300 price tag.

But as for the rest of your letter, that's certainly a novel way to get something out of the Xbox. My only wonder is why you'd want a stripped-down machine like that when you already have an "expensive system" already catered to your own needs. Maybe the idea of using Excel with a large black controller is too fun to pass up.

Use only as directed
I was rather suprized to see how few third parties were touting their gamecube wares. Didn't Nintendo say that they've got lots of third party support now? Where's all the goods, man?!  

-zumpiez

Don't forget that we haven't seen the full extent of the first-party lineup, either. Mario and Zelda titles are confirmed to be showing at Spaceworld, so it's very possible that Nintendo is playing it close to the vest until then, without showing their third-party stuff yet.

Closing Comments:

I wasn't entirely kidding yesterday when I put Tomak: Save the Earth in contention for Game of Show, as it was certainly a bigger surprise than almost anything else. What do you think? What's your favorite off-kilter weird game? Remember, nothing counts if it's so tame as to actually see U.S. release--I don't want want twenty letters about Incredible Crisis here.

-Nich Maragos, turning Korean

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