Hello Andrew

I think you're quite right about the letter collumn. BUT! While the GIA's collumn is my favorite, sometimes I feel like it is just an extension of the message board, except that it is moderated (since someone chooses the replies to the topic and all). The GIA's letter collumn is a bit different than most, it usually brings a topic that we discuss sometimes for more than one day, but that's what makes it a lot like the message boards. Q&A collumns started by being just that, questions and answers, at least most of the time.

Now you guys got something new, but I feel like it could have been a special board where a new topic is set (not like at Square Gamer where it isn't game related) and where people give their own replies. In a way it lets everyone give their own answer, nobody has a more valuable answer over the others, and if the host of the collumn(board) makes a reply then at least the person who the host replied to has a chance to reply to if he has anything valuable to add. What do you think? I still like the letter tho:)

-Phil *wark*

Hey AK,

Agh! This really pissed me off, I went into Sam Goody over the weekend to buy "Is There Anybody Out There?", the live recording of "The Wall" at Berlin in the early 80's, by Pink Floyd. I'm sure you've heard of them. Anyway, I walked in, and there was some r&b/rap crap music playing, but I ignored it. I strode to the popular section and picked up the double CD. When I handed the CD to the clerk to ring it up... SHE DROPPED IT ON THE FLOOR!. Not a few inches, a good 4 feet straight to the floor. Thinking nothing of it she just picked it up and put it in the bag. Now, I'm sure that she hadn't even ever heard of Floyd, and her musical knowledge was limited to puff daddy, etc. I can bet that if she dropped the CD of a singer (if you can even call them that) she knew on the floor, she'd rush to go get me another one. I inspected the CD, but as it was still seran wrapped, I couldn't tell of any major damage. When I got home, it turns out several pices of plastic broke off... DAMN! That really bugged me... what's worse, I'm too lazy to go get another one...

--Brian W. "I pronounce AK as ack"

Andy, (can I call you Andy?)

You are right, yesterday's rant was entirely inappropriate. I was about to flame you for it, but then I actually read the column of which you speak.

Yeesh, what happened? After you left, that poor column decayed faster than my roommate's body. (That reminds me, I'll have to throw it out one of these days.) No wonder I stopped reading it.

And now for my complaint. I have nothing to do! Yesterday I pretty much sat around all day waiting for the weekend to be over. Same deal today. Boredom sucks. My middle finger to those who said college would be fun.

I could keep going, but I don't want to depress anyone too much. Keep updating the one decent RPG related column.

AK,

Ya know what bugs me? The favortism that flows through Chris Jones' column! How many times do I see the same people over and over again! They do not make any better of a point than other people; in fact, my bet is that other people are writing better stuff. But to read the same people over and over again is sickening. And no offense, but you have to tell me that better letters were written besides a guy ranting about staying up till your update. It's a about RPG'S! Jones talks about not playing favorites, about the obviousness of it is beyond overbearing.

It's almost not worth writing in to the column when the chances are some local bumpkin will certainly be chosen over you merely because favorites are chosen.

I'm certain other people have noticed, I think those people need to write in as well.

So there's my rant.

Take it easy,
EdgarFigaro

Hi AK,

Just wanted to drop in with a quick thought about Persona 2: why are we assuming that its release could be at best an utter failure? I'm referring to the letter by Tom that you printed yesterday...ehr...this morning...

Now, I gather that he has played both games as imports (I haven't). Is it possible, however, that Atlus thought that if its localization team put enough effort into it (I know, I know, such a gamble *may* backfire) in the way of adding enough backstory in the text boxes (Xenogear-type strategy though it may be) that it really wouldn't make that much of a difference whether one has played the previous game or not? Let's give Atlus some credit: if they didn't think it was possible to release them backwards, or release just one of the two, why would they do it? To lose capital? I seriously doubt it.

As for the competition, much as I'm slowly warming up to the latest installment of Final Fantasy, I've played enough traditional Fantasy RPGs this year to last me a lifetime, so I'm actually considering snapping up Persona 2 right away, and wait until the holidays or beyond for FFIX.... That may just be part of the strategy for Atlus: besides FM3 and PE2 (the former ruled, the latter sucks), how many console RPGs have you played this year that didn't involve such elements as: dungeons, demons, dragons, princesses, and ancient artifacts? Now, some people are more than happy to stick with those settings, but I do like a change of pace once in a while....

Princess "But I like confusing plots!!!!" Jemmy

AK,

You wanna know whay pisses me off? Other than the fact that you post so dang late (I was up till 6AM EST and the column still wasnt up), and that you usually lack a topic, or at least one that is related to gaming.

That aside, my biggest grip is the lack of challenge in the newer RPGs. I have breezed through them with so much ease its pathetic. The most recent one I played that was remotely challenging was FFT, and one you have Orlandu that games a no brainer. B4 that, the only on I really had a hard time was was ffIVj, cause of long standing tradititon to do the cave to summoned monsters and the sylph's cave as soon as I get my airship sliverplated. and the lunar castle and bahamuts place also usually whoop me. What happened to the difficulty in RPGs? It disappeared a long time ago, even in strategy games... though I have yet to play OB64 since getting a PSX2 comes first, but judgung from the pevious games I have played I don't think it will present that much of a challenge. Any recommendatoins? I am currently re-working Warsong and shining force cause they gave me a challenge and still do (I STILL cannot beat stage 11 on warsong dangit). Help me please? Mayve we should hold Sakaguchi and crew hostage until the FFIX difficulty is tweaked?

Efrate, fonding looking at his old cartridge RPGs. "well time to get cracking."

Dear Sir,

I hate New Mexico! I used to live in California, and now it's hard being more than 15 miles from a beach. And the elevation here, the highest point in America is only a bike ride from here! That makes it really hard to breath! Not only that, but we're 40 miles from the nearest town, and I don't have a car yet. Meaning I have to beg someone for a ride whenever I want something. I don't have any friends my age here, and when I met a girl at an arcade I realized that she lives 40 miles from me, making asking her out pointless. So I'm gonna be lonely and bored until I can get up enough money to get an apartment in CA or Seattle, a car, and enough money to live comfortably for a month before I can get a job and my first paycheck. I figure this'll take $3000, and I'm getting minimum wage for being a gopher on a construction site, I average $100 a week, that's $300 a month when I take away expenses (video games and food). I figure I'll have to live here for at least another year before I get the hell out. This really sucks.

Gilbert

That opening statement of yours just filled my wee little heart with so much joy that I couldn't be bothered to read the rest of the column before sending this in. I've been thinking the EXACT SAME THING for ages now, but I had no one to talk to about it. Was I just insane? Were those signatures actually cool? Was it me who was unbelievably annoying and not the columnists? No! While I may be annoying, I was not crazy! I'm glad to know that someone (and a relatively well respected someone, at that) agrees with me.

Also, the whole fake name thing (I'm gonna call myself Gunglesnap!) really bothers me.

Hey AK,

First, I have something to say about your *other RPG site* bashing yesterday (hey, we can be professional about this, no?). True, it's not the BEST-run column on the web on the web, but at least it knows what it is. Your email address is "qak" for "question/answer" and "Andrew Kaufmann." Is it just me, or is something wrong with this? I counted 2 letters with questions in it yesterday, one of which was "why does Ashley's ass hang out?" I must admit Andy, you run a pretty good editrial letters column. But at least *the host of said other site* keeps his eyes on the subject at hand, which is answering questions. No, He doesnt have a perfect track record at having a questions-only column, but it's much more controlled than your (and actually, Chris does this more) marathon debates and discussions about whether games are art or not. There's nothing exactly wrong with this, but maybe it should find its own section, so the Q&A column actually contains a few questions, and answers to go with them. That's it, I'm done.

~Odin~, who's pissed off at how close FF9 and Lunar 2 are being released as well

I hate people who ask for paper!! It the most annoying thing a person can do at a grocery store. Don't even get me started on double paper. I also hate when I'm on the express line and someone writes a check. Get a freaking debit card!!!!

MurkyDeath-most bitter cashier on the planet

Uh, I dunno about if your Cosplay comments were real or sarcastic, but I'll send in this e-mail anyway.

Most American cosplayers aren't paid. Some of the ones in Japan are though. Some are the equivalent of Game Show booth girls, except usually they actually know they characters they're dressing up as because they've played the game.

American cosplayers just usually do it for fun. They usually only do it at Anime Conventions, although sometimes they also do it at events like the Metreon. My friend dressed up as Rinoa when FF8 first hit stores to buy her copy of it at the local EB.

But yah. More examples of American cosplayers who just do it for fun can be seen at www.phoenixseed.com, if you're interested. We're a cosplay group that did some FF8 costumes at Anime Expo last year. Feel free to delete this paragraph if the letter actually gets posted because it's a rather blatant advertisement.

~ Tonberry

AK,

Ya know what bugs me?? For the last 11 years I've been working hard to break into the gaming biz. I've designed a ton of characters. Written plot after plot. I even have a collection music that either was the inspiration for a scene, or would fit perfectly in my vision for an area (like overworld, town, boss music, etc). In May I'll graduate with a degree in 3D animation, and next year I'll be going for a second degree in Computer Science (I want ta Produce). I've read more works of literature, and histories than I can remember, and I'm fluent and literate in Mandarin, English, and Japanese...

...All for the sake of tuning myself into the ultimate game producing machine. (I apologise for sounding egotistic there, it just leads to my next point)

But now I'm starting to think. Why would I ever want to get into the gaming industry? It's filled with nothing but money grubbing whores!!!! I mean when a company decides to make a system for the sheer fact of "hey, we could smoke Sony." There's absolutely nothing genuine of sincere about that. That shows me nothing of a desire for the exploration of art, or the desire to create something that is either entrenching or just plain enjoyable (and an afterthought mention to art makes the situation even less sincere).

And not just hardware, but software companies are like that too. Core and their Tomb Raider series anyone?? The whole company of Capcom? Who doesn't have a racing game... Mario, Choccobo, Crash, DK...or Snowboarding/Xtream games game of some sort. I really liked DOA2 too, but what, soon there will be like 4 versions (JP and US)? and all of them different. And now few console specific games. I actually applaud Square for their silly little quarrel with Nintendo, and for that reason not porting any games to the GBA. It shows that they're human (although Square can hardly be exempt from being disgustingly dedicated to money), and are capable of letting personal qualms come between profit. Enix too in their decision to lower the graphical prowess for their flagship game to a sub-Saturn generation one game, therefore alienating anyone who doesn't actually know about the game from buying it. Why? Because it's almost like a big middle finger to Square for setting the "standard" in RPGs. Not that I don't love Square or anything, but I like the juvenile competition here.

The whole industry has just gotten so large and corrupt, it's gotten like..eewww...should I dare say it... Hollywood. I've only seen about 2 or 3 movies come out of there in the last ten years that I actually thought were brilliant, and now I fear that the gaming industry is going to become just like that. and just as I'm about to get into it too...

Genji

Rock on AK, I agree 100% with you about that other letters column, in fact I got so pissed off at them that a wrote a letter to them, like a week ago or two. It did not get posted or even get a response to. I really enjoyed their columns early on but not now. I know you probably don't want a war going on between the sites but it would really be cool if you posted my letter to them on your site. :) Anyways I think you will get a kick out of the letter I sent them.

My letter to that other site:

1. Has this column always been traditionally only a QA column? I seem to recall its always been a mix letters and questions. I know you advise people who want to get their opinions out to use the editorial section. There are two problems with this, the opinions are not long/extensive or it is not specifically an editorial at all. I know your ready to hit the delete button or already have but please read the rest.

2. What the harm of having "letters" and not "questions"? Other sites such as THEGIA don't have a problem with these things called "letters." Or if you really feel the page should remain strictly QA then why not take psx.ign.com approach and have a QA and Letters column. I know you don't want to read extensive letters so set a word limit on them.

3. Would something like this get posted in the Editorial section? I don't think so because it is not rpg related.

Yeah I understand that what you do takes lots of time and work but you are volunteering for this. Just relax man (or woman), you don't have to put so many restrictions. People like to read stuff besides "where to I find the mystical sword of happy land." Just post this and see if people agree with you or myself. Perhaps use the poll on the site to see if people want a QA, a letters page, or a combo. This column does not have to be perfect, it should be what the readers make it, so if you get crap letters or questions post it. Wonder if you hit the delete key yet? P.S I admire your hard work and dedication to the site, please don't be offended by this, I just have a different view from yours.

You know what I'm getting tired of? Breathing. Over and over, on and on. What happens if you stop? You die. So you gotta keep on breathing, sometimes more than 60 times a minute! This is ridiculous! I am personally starting a petition to god to see that this nuisance goes no further.

AK

Three words. The Dallas Cowboys. I don't know if it's the fact that after watching toady's game and learning that their definition of tackle is to jump 5 feet from the runningback or wide receiver and touch them with a hand, or the fact that Aikman can't get it 50 - 60 yards any more, and throws 5 interceptions. Come on people! Cunningham proved himself to be a lot better than Aikman when it really counts a couple of games ago, so why not throw him in when Aikman turns to crap? Not only that, but I bet you that every single Cowboy owns a suburban and parks them in the smallest parking lots they can find.

Chewbacca X

P.S. I also bet you that when they get home late at night from an away game the first thing they do is mow their yard. And they got some big yards to mow.

P.S.S. Judging by the normal audience of the letters section, only 5% will know what I'm talking about.

Mr. K,

Dammit, it's about time somebody showed those folks at that "other website" what for. And who better to do it than you? Everything you've said has been %100 justified. In fact, I can tell you were pulling your punches.

Don't back down! Stand your ground!

I find it regrettable that such sophomoric drivel has made its way on to what was once a quality website.

---Anthony James Larrea

AK Nah, it's ok for you to critize that OTHER website's letters section 'cause yours is so much better than their's and you are cooler than they are and you rule! -Agent X "kissing up=letter printed"

AK,

My gripe: Good N64 games are still too expensive. For the price one would pay for a new copy of Ogre Battle 64, I bought a Dreamcast keyboard ($20), Metal Gear Solid (w/ guide for $15!), Maken X ($10, which seems like a fair price for the game), and Brave Fencer Musashi ($15). Hmm...why am I complaining? I have tons of cool new stuff to play with!

-Dan

P.S. I bought Ogre Battle 64, too. So suck on that!

You asked for a rant and here it comes:

What pisses me off are old people. They think all of us "young people" are mischievous and bad people. They give us looks when we travel in groups, and blame everything on "those goddamned kids." Having worked as a waiter for six and a half months, I've seen the worst of the worst. Bitchy old people who cant stand you and tip like pieces of shit. If you're going to o out to eat, bring enough fucking money to tip the person who has to constantly keep asking you to repeat yourself or talk louder because you're deaf, and then keep a straight face and pretend you don't want to shoot them with a high-powered rifle. They also eat up BILLIONS of tax dollars through Social Security and Medicare, and billions more through pensions and other payments from former employers. The tax money could be used for far more important things that actually matter towards the future of the human race such as a complete education system overhaul(Gore would love to do all that he says but where's the money going to come from?), medical research to help solve the mystery behind cancer, AIDS, and other diseases that afflict YOUNGER people who have their whole lives ahead of them and actually CONTRIBUTE to society, not TAKE from it. Money could also go towards cleaning the environment so that future generations who aren't even alive yet could experience the same living conditions as we are now. There would also be more available housing for the homeless people and more food available for the hungry people. Automotive insurance would almost definitely decrease and as would the cost of health care. Health care would also be much for affordable because many of the companies who make drugs that are mainly used for elderly afflictions could now concentrate on producing already existing medicines or even research and develop new ones.

My proposal is to kill off all "senior citizens" at the age of 75. At this time, they would all have to pass physical and mental competency tests. Pass and you live a year, fail and you die. There are exceptions: 1) If they are raising children. 2) If they own land or property and are renting/leasing it to someone under 75. 3) If they run a business. 4) Other, this one would be decided by an appointed committee in Washington that would define other terms for life extension. The terms would be re-evaluated each year and additions or subtractions could be made.

Obviously, coming from a college student, this is very biased, but if everyone worked as a waiter/waitress for 6 months, or any job that is frequented by the elderly, you would see prime examples of what I am referring to. Of course I wouldn't want my grandparents to be offed, but it's my proposal so deal. I've met grandparents of other kids my age and they're just terrible.

"That's just my opinion, I could be wrong."

-Evilgenius

Ak,

Man, I totally agree with what you said about that other site. I have felt the same way for so long. Those graphic signatures REALLY grate on my nerves and so does the way that the usual host conducts the forum. I REALLY don't care whats in thier PSX's, NES's, genesis or whatever. Just answer the letters, try not to talk about your normal life so much, get off your damned high horse, and TRY to do a decent column without telling us ONCE AGAIN what your favorite anime are! If you think that the column is bad now, you should have read it when this Brad L. fellow was hosting. Every other sentence was about his girlfriend or how much he liked Asheron's Call. I applaud you for criticising that thier column and being the voice for all of us who despise that column.

6025-wondering why they even bother putting up news if it all comes from The GIA anyway....

your link to the rinoa picture is fake! i got some strange mouse-drawn paintbrush thing...

roy

Well, I'd written a long rant about the lack of good music recently released (Up was a whole two years ago, and XTC's Wasp Star a year ago, and nothing I've listened to since has really caught my attention), how there's nothing to read (poor student won't let himself buy C$40 hardcover books, and it takes, like, a year and a half for most things to go mass-market these days), how I'm too busy with exams and papers and stuff and too poor to buy CC, and how my girlfriend has moved to Burma and become a Buddhist nun (which makes for a good story to tell people I've met in bars, although I still feel I'm getting the a poor deal), and how, to top it all off, instead of writing a term paper I'm sitting here wasting time writing this letter. But I decided that I didn't want to complain so I erased it all. Rants are passe, I didn't want to subject you to a whiny run-on sentence with too many brackets. Lucky escape, buddy.

Oh, and wasowaso? What the hell type of dog says "wasowaso"?

-Ryan, prepared to be told that in Japan dogs say wasowaso. It won't be the wierdest foreign onmatapiea I've encountered, I'll tell you that.

PS. Allan told me a long time ago that you keep Stalin's ashes in your sock (I forget which one) and I don't think I ever bothered to ask you if it's true. Is it?

Ever have a neighbor with a particularly annoying dog? Then perhaps you can *begin* to understand how I feel and why my 'solution' to the problem is so appealing.

Picture a New York City rat wearing a white mop. That just about sums up the physical description, and no, I have no clue what the breed is. So what is my beef with this ugly-ass pitiful excuse for a football? EVERY morning between 5-7 am the dog barks for some reason or another. A car drives down our street, the neighborhood cat comes out, someone goes jogging, whatever and the dog starts barking. What's worse is the bark is a throaty rasp of a bark that sounds like Little Richard trying to sing while someone chokes him. It's terrible!

So why don't I close the windows you ask? I do! I live in a detached art studio (detached from my parents house), it's the perfect place for a twenty-one year old bum...err...uhhh...College Student. Rather, it would be perfect except for the proximity to the exact spot where the little rat barks EVERY morning, it's right next to my room! AAAARRRGGGGHHHH!!!!! I have been shooting it every morning with a BB gun forcing the dog to bark elsewhere (who said classical conditioning doesn't work?) but the stupid thing still barks relatively close. It's driving me freakin' insane! Do I shoot to kill with a real gun? Kidnap the dog and take into a neighboring county? What? AAAAARRRRGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!

Justin Bohlman

Yes it is rude, and yes, it is probably uncalled for. It's also spot-on. I'll admit that I still read that letters column most days, though my attraction is more akin to slowing down to look at a train wreck sprawled across four lanes of rush hour traffic than anything voluntary. Anyway, thanks for pointing out what everyone already knew... hope we can leave it at that without a debate/flame-war raging across the next couple days.

And the katakana is Goog's "sig" is still wrong, no matter what he says.

-Anson (Dance... Dance... REVOLUTION!)

Dear Andrew--

It's a shame that after my reading and enjoying the DA column near-daily since the site's inception, your rant has been the first thing in a while for me to fell riled enough to write a response, and with such vitrol. But here goes.

"the letters column is at another RPG site, one that I was a founder of, actually."

Ah, yes. In case no one knows what he means (and for shame for you not knowing Kaufmann's every achievement), it's rpgamer.com . I don't know why Andrew would bash so heavily without naming names... maybe he feels it's out of line or something.*

"Wow.

Their letters columnists are the perfect example of why you should not hand control of a forum to an idiot."

Please, Gran'pa Kaufmann, tell us how the column compares to when it was headed by YOU in the old days!

"I read a couple of weekday columns, including one where the letter columnist brings as a guest host HIMSELF. I mean, I have a massive ego, but at least I don't invite myself as a guest host to my own column."

Yeah, that would be as bad as constanlty printing letters with shameless mentions of your favorite bands, or pissing and moaning about other fan site letter columns aren't up to your standards and... oh, wait, nevermind.

"Now, no, this didn't do anything to me, so if you feel my attacking their letters column is out of line, then that's fine."

Don't worry, the last time I can remeber a letter column host posting a whiny rant about another lettercolumn host, he only got fired. But I don't think he was best-friends-forever with the site's founder, so, lead on, MacGruff, crime-fighting dog!

"It probably is out of line, and if you think so, I apologize."

*Oh, wait. Never mind. Spoke too soon.

Well, that's good that you're sorry. Now, from that sentance, I'm wondering if you're apologizing for it being out of line? Or are you apologizing for us thinking so?

"But MAN"

He's using capital letters! For emphasis! It must be important!

"those writers have an incredible opportunity, being given control of a large forum for no reason other than being in the right place at the right time,"

::cough::potkettleblack:: Sorry. Damned allergies. And sheesh, yeah, letter columns are the be-all and end-all of existence! Those Phillistines! Being so cheap and petty with thier power! ::coughcough::lookinthemirror::wheeze:: 'scuse me.

"and they use it as their personal space to whine and moan about not getting the kind of letters they want."

They should use it to whine and moan about other people's columns instead!

"Cry me a river. It looks to me like they think they're doing the world a favor by answering letters, and if people don't do it to their exact specifications, then they just don't want to play that game anymore."

Yeah! That was only fair when ALLAN MILLGAN did it, those st00pid luserz!!!11!

"I used to think I was "above" trash talking and name calling, but sometimes you want to take a load off, you know?"

Yeah! When I'm stressed, that's my favorite way to relax! Making personal grievances private! And bashing others! Especially the 'competition'!

"I'm far from perfect, so feel free to retaliate, sirs at other site."

That's right, jabroni! The Kauff is calling you out! Though he won't name you by name, or say where you're from, it DOESN'T MATTER! IF YOU SMELLELELELELL! what flamebait THE KAUFF! IS COOKING!

"And by the way, what's up with those really irritating graphic signatures? Does anybody think those are cool?"

Yeah, 'cause *I* don't! And since *I* don't like it, it must be something bad!

"I don't get it. And the design is befuddling too. What's up with the massive white space between their intro and the letters?"

Ooh! Ooh! This is a Seinfeld-esque set-up! I bet it will be for some sort of joke! Let me prepare a clean pair of shorts!

"It's like, hey, one day we might have something to say in an intro (not that I ever do), so we'd better leave a HUGE amount of space for it!"

BWAHAH HAHA HAH AH HAH HAH HAH HAH AHA HAAAAAAH! Whew! Good thing I had an extra pair of shorts! I nearly pissed myself from anti-laughter. That was just like Seinfeld-- it was neither truly insightful nor funny! Even with the HUGE! In CAPS! For emphasis!

"Wow. I intended to end this rant about 3 paragraphs ago, but it's so much fun I just can't stop."

Yeah, I love using a highly trafficed forum to shameless flame other people! Hey, Lowtax does it all the time, right?

"I'll try to control myself though, since it's very unprofessional and probably downright rude."

[eldorado]You have that little voice inside of you-- okay, okay, pretend you did-- [/eldoarado] Hmm. His conscience can't seem to find the delete key. Ah well.

"Maybe I feel like I have the right to be critical, since it was my idea for that site to have a letters column in the first place. Maybe that's what makes me all the more bitter."

Yeah, Gran'pa Kauffman! Those damned kids are sending the country to hell! They obviously can't compare to when *you* hosted it! They can't even compare to when you *thought* of it!

"The more I think about it, the more I think how unprofessional this is. But, remember the disclaimer!"

Look! Look! The "being an arrogant jerk" clause is written inbetween the lines in invisible ink! And besides, if you get mad at me it's okay! There's a disclaimer! Look! It's even big enough to hide behind!

"We all see it so often that we overlook it, but there it is at the top of this page."

After the header. And an ad banner. And that kewl-1337 Double Agent graphic that has a sqaure that goes blink-blink and kinda looks like a cursor or text prompt (Which is far more clever than stupid yucky boring lame-o graphical signatures). And a "headline" and date, folowed by the column's author.

"Everything here is my thoughts, not the GIA's."

Yeah, there's a disclaimer! It's big enough for the SITE to hide behind!

"So, like, if you think I'm being a stupid jerk, hey, let me know."

Gosh no, Gran'pa Kauffman! Those evil untalented letter columnists or pissing all over your legacy! I'm gonna go egg their houses right now!

"I might even print your letter. I don't mind criticism."

I'm waiting.

--Shawn David Struck

AK,

Mmmm, I love it when you diss other people...Will you humiliate a letter writer today for me? Pretty please? And maybe later I can watch you whip Chris like the dog he is. Make him squeal, AK, make him SQUEAL!

~Ian P.

P.S. You know what really pisses me off? The X-Box.