If you think that kids will be paying for their own PS2's, and their lack of money will prevent the sale of the machine, you would be forgetting one fact:

Most teens I knew didn't exactly buy most of their own stuff. They get Mommy and Daddy to either buy it for them, or get it for them for Christmas/Birthday/Insert particular gift-giving holiday here.

Why would this be any different? The economy is good, people are in a buy, buy, spend, spend mode, and everybody is happy. Sometimes it's easy to forget that just because we're big kids now that not everybody is in the same situation.

-Etiam, delenda est Carthago. Caine

I came to precisely the same conclusion about Revolver Ocelot / Big Boss a while ago. Besides the evidence offered earlier, I have a few more items:

1) Their faces in the manual art are actually identical if you edit out the facial hair (well, besides the eyepatch.)

2) At the end of the original Metal Gear, Big Boss wields a revolver in battle. When he's fighting against a rocket-launcher-equipped Snake, he'd have to have a real affinity for the weapon (much as Ocelot does.)

3) Also during the torture scene, Ocelot implies having known Liquid for some time in the past and knows that he's Snake's brother, despite the fact that none of the other Fox Hound members are aware of this.

The evidence is pretty solid (uh, sorry) all the way around.

-Matthew Schuele

This is not a "crazy game theory/manifesto/conspiracy" or whatever. This is a response to the final letter of your last column.

Ocelot's identity that is a "secret from everyone" is that of the Defense Secretary. You can tell because they have the same voice actor--as well as the Def. Secretary's obvious connection to the president. Sorry

-Some other Kupan

Dear Mr. Cosner,

To the untrained eye, the Gilgamesh card seems decidedly unMANly. However, if you consider that you can convert that bad boy into 10 holy wars, (very useful against Omega Weapon), well, you'll realize that Gilgamesh was making the ultimate sacrifice. He let himself be a weak card so that you would change into those holy wars... he knows they'll help. But if Gilgamesh was an awesome GF card, as he very well could have been, it would have been much more painful to give him up to the Gods.

-Mikey, most likely.

This isn't a conspiracy that's within an RPG, it's a conspiracy that IS an RPG. I'm talking , of course, about this Thousand Arms fiasco, which is obviously nothing more than the figment of a highly evolved imagination.

It appears that it's all nothing but a scam cooked up by the folks at Babbage's and Software Etc. to pad the pockets of a "game developer" known as Atlus. Worst of all, they've suckered in the GIA!

It began with some gameplay "details" that were "leaked" to the GIA. Once they had our attention, they followed up with "character sketches" and "screen shots." But the most nefarious part of their plan didn't unfold until summer. After missing enough release dates to make a Working Designs coder blush, they rushed out an unispiring demo disc with large amounts of bailing wire and spit protruding from its reflective surface. Said disc was "free" with a $10 reservation fee at Software Etc.

Now that "Atlus" had their hands on some green, they slapped a Thousand Arms label on a beta realease of Lunar: SSC and sent it out as a "review copy" to attention-span-challenged videogame magazine editors, who were still reeling from playing FF8 and didn't realize that they'd just played the same game a few weeks before.

Their crime complete, the "Atlus" staffers departed for extradition-free Grand Cayman Island, where they have been raising some serious hell on the beach. For their hard work, the CEOs of Babbage's and Software Etc. will get to spend a week in the sun with the "Atlus" team and supermodel Vendela.

Many rebels died to bring you this information. Please use it wisely.

-Pilcrow

My insane theory is that Rinoa is Ultimecia!!! Why you ask? Well lets look at the facts.

1.) At the end of the game Rinoa is the only sorceress left. She has all her powers. All that power is enough to drive someone insane.

2.) When Ultimecia is in pain and ready to die she goes to the place that she feels safe, the field of flowers near to Edea's house. Where Squall and Rinoa promised that they would meet. Isn't it funny how Squall also ended up there? It's like he was drawn to Ultimecia by his promise.

3.) That screwed up "acid trip" part of the ending FMV before the "happy, romantic" part of the FMV. I mean what the HELL was that all about? Near the end of the acid trip part where you see Rinoa, Utimecia and Squall's eyes interposed it makes you feel as if there is a strong connection between Rinoa and Ultimecia.

FF8's version of Time Travel was a very predestined, Twelve Monkey's version of Time Travel, not the fun happy Back to the Future or Chrono Trigger type so even if Squall tells Rinoa there is no way she could have changed the future.

P.S. Another answer is that Ultimecia could have been Squall and Rinoa's Daughter.

Ultimecia, Ultimecia. She has no character development in FF8. She's the most banal villain since Zeromus from FF4 and she's introduced almost as poorly as he was. Even her goals are rather unclear. But there are many things in the periphery of FF8's plot that hint at far more coolness than you may have imagined...

If you scan Tiamat in her castle, the text says that it was formerly a Guardian Force. Her final form is able to put the smackdown on any Guardian Force you have in your possession with just one hit. Finally she commands the most powerful Guardian Force ever imagined (created?) -- Griever -- coincidentally (or perhaps not?) Squall's personal symbol. So Ultimecia is possibly the greatest manipulator of Guardian Forces the world can offer.

But why? Why would a sorceress need to use Guardian Forces, when sorceresses already command all the world's magic?

Dr. Odine studied a sorceress at some point in the past in order to even DEVELOP the Guardian Force technology, so naturally they can be no more powerful than their source. In fact, given that Guardian Forces "reside in a person's mind" it is incredibly likely that they are nothing but a form of brainwave pattern common to all sorceresses, much like Ellone's time-travelling power. The knowledge of Guardian Forces comes from Odine's first study ... but listen to this...

When Ultimecia was defeated, where did she end up? In the past, ready to collapse at Edea's feet. And what happened? She bestowed all of those incredible powers -- the knowledge of the most powerful Guardian Force, the ability to manifest them physically whenever she wanted -- DIRECTLY ONTO EDEA. And then? Edea teams up with Cid to found SeeD and the Gardens... the ONLY military force to use Guardian Forces to any significant degree. Meanwhile, Dr. Odine studies a sorceress in Esthar to uncover Guardian Force technology on his own. Who is the major sorceress in Esthar? Why, Adel of course. And who is in control of Adel during the past? BINGO! Ultimecia again!! So Guardian Forces came from Adel and Edea -- both of whose powers came from Ultimecia. Fascinating, isn't it? The Guardian Forces may be nothing more than segments of Ultimecia's mind.

Is it any wonder that Ultimecia is so paranoid about SeeD's purpose? Ultimecia, in trying to augment her own power, ended up as the means to her own destruction. And now the bit about erased memories has much more significance...

- J. FORD

P.S. I don't even want to think about where Squall got the idea to use Griever as his symbol. Nor do I much want to think why Griever is Scanned as "The most powerful GF in Squall's mind."