Once upon a time, I vowed something to you readers. I vowed that, in the event that the GIA ever became professional, I would resign. That the heart of the site would be ripped out at that point, that we'd become just another gaming website. Well, we're racking up record number of visitors. We covered the E3 floor. We have banners. We even have developers showing up on our message boards (though I wish that fact had revealed itself under more pleasant circumstances). In the months since our launch back in November, we've become somewhat established. Not the biggest, baddest kid on the block, but we're not small fry any longer. We're pros. So where does this leave me? One of the fundamental facets of Double Agent is that I gleefully take risks. I swear, I snort, I toss up bizarre imagery in often repulsive detail. I've pissed off many a reader in this fashion. In the process, I've assembled what is perhaps the most argumentative readership you'll find in this business. And dammit, I like it this way. I'm proud of this column. But how do I reconcile my desire to push buttons with a professional atmosphere? Will Company X be scared off from working with us, due to my extremism? Might our banner provider pull their services due to questionable content? The answer to these questions is simple: we cover GIA's collective ass. Rather than cleaning up Double Agent, we're opting to take the Mission: Impossible method. At the top of every column I write for this site, I am affixing a disclaimer. The opinions expressed in this column, the images created, the language used, it's all me. This isn't a license for me to start swearing like George Carlin all the time, but it makes the obvious clear to everyone: these words are only representative of my attitudes. Double Agent is tough. Wear a cup.
The opinions expressed within this column are those of the participants and the moderator, and do not neccessarily reflect those of the GIA. There is coarse language and potentially offensive material afoot. Don't say I didn't warn you. :) | Life and love with the Binks-man | hey seb. i just went to see star wars andd elt me say jar jar binks is the coolest ever. i think they should make a game about him, you know, like where he cols go around and do stuff and solve quests andb so on!!! i think that would kik a$$. love, CCCheryl PS> JAR JAR RULEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ~!!! |
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH. The only way I'd like to see Jar Jar Binks in a video game is in a casket. I'm somewhat ashamed and amazed that a fictional character could create such contempt and hatred in me. I mean, he's a passel of pixels that's incapable of speaking coherently. He's like a futuristic Charlie Chaplin, without the charm, disarming good looks, talent, or humor value. And yet, every time I see this bloody creature, I feel like someone's running their fingernails down my eyeballs. Ahem. I can only say that no, I don't think Jar Jar Binks should star in a video game of any kind, and wish you the best of luck in the Darwin Awards, miss. | Flaws and annoying characters | To Seb, The Man with the Master Plan, We've all talked about good or bad RPGs over and over again. How Lunaris incredibly awesome and how 7th Saga is so horrid that it needs to rotin some sort of personal game hell (Which I agree with 100%...Esunascared me ;_;). But has anyone played a game where, roughly the entirepopulation hates the game, but you like it because of one or two 'savinggrace' features? Let me give you an example...actually two. Earthbound. If you look backon this quirky Nintendo game...you would normally think 'this gamesucks!' The graphics were retro at best...the battle system wasnice...but nothing innovative...and the music had a few good tracks, buta lot of them were filler machine noises. Yet, I liked this game. Alot...solely because of the story line. While it was pretty blandoverall (Alien comes down to Earth. Hero gathers three friends to killit before it kills you.), it was written in such a quirky way that youactually wanted to see what would happen next, just so you could talk tothe NPCs and see what would come out of their mouths. The translationwas also very good, from what I could remember. Another game that had this exact same setup was Vay for the Sega-CD. Agame probably none of you remember unless you played Working Designsgames in the Sega-CD games. The set up is the same...everything aboutthe game was mediocre at a glance. The overall story line was pluckedfrom Phantasy Star Three (Bad guys kill parents and kidnap bride onPrince's Wedding Day...only this time there's random mechs thrown in),the graphics were only fair...and the overhead graphics absolutelysucked. The combat was the oldest system possible...right out ofDW1...yet the game grew on me and gained a little spot in my memorysolely because of WD's translation, risquŽ humor ("You know what youpeople are? You people are...SASSY!"), and overall cool (yetdeliberately corny) plot twists. Of course, I can think of other games, such as Super Mario RPG...whereeverything sucked except music and graphics. (I'm sorry...collectingstars and jumping on people's heads did NOT do anything for me, but Ilistened to the music and oohed and the pretty graphics!). And, on a totally unrelated note, I sit here and play my rented Tales ofDestiny...realizing that I hate Chelsea with a passion. I want her todie. A lot. We should force her to sit down and watch the Teletubbie'sseries from beginning to end JUST to make her catatonic, and shut herup. Oh how nice that would be if she was real :P. We know who yourfavorite and least favorite RPG characters are. (I think.) but which RPGcharacter do you find most ANNOYING? I think Chelsea gets a gold starfrom me. Thanks for your time, Seb ^_^ Lucca RPG Cafe [Which will soon feature my much-touted 7th Saga fanfic, by the by. - Al] "CandyXXX, the 'fun' friend for a new generation." |
From Jar Jar Binks to annoying RPG characters. Sigh. There's a sad symmetry there, I tell you. As for the "saving grace" games, yes, I've certainly encountered a few. One of my pet favourites is Spike McFang, a little-known SNES action/RPG. It's pretty generic and unimpressive in every respect, except for the basic style. It's a superdeformed, cute-as-hell kid vampire who lobs his top hat at enemies to defeat them. There's no reason to recommend the game above others on the basis of gameplay, but the bizarre and unique style makes it a memorable pet favourite. Agent Assignment for the day: what's your favourite underdog game? The most obscure, the better. I'd love to get some discussing rolling about some lesser-known gems hereabouts. Or even lesser-known buckets of pig crap. As for the most annoying RPG character? Well, I include Jar Jar Binks in the running just for form's sake. He's so awful that he makes unrelated things miserable, too. Bastard. Chu-Chu, of Xenogears infamy, is pretty close. I haven't replayed that game since I finished it the first time, and I place the blame on uncontrolled text speed, Babel Tower, and Chu-Chu. But in the end, I've gotta go with Lemina, from Lunar: Eternal Blue. Lovely game, features my favourite RPG heroine (Jean!), but god, Lemina is obnoxious. For the record, she's a dubiously useful mage with an attitude problem, and in the Argh category, the single most obnoxious voice in gaming history. She makes the cast of Brave Fencer Musashi sound like James Earl Jones. She makes C-Ko, of anime series Project A-Ko, almost tolerable by comparison. And she never shuts her mouth. I'm feeling ill just thinking about her, so let's move on. | Craveyard sadness | I saw the story on your site saying that Crave had shut down gamedevelopment, it also says that the company will focus on localization (read:translation) of games. Before this I had thought to myself that since Cravehad Ted Woolsey that translations would be above the norm, maybe evenworking designs quality, without all the jokes and delays, but now I'm notso sure. What's your take on all this and the possible quality of Crave'stranslations in the future? -Kit |
From what I know of the Crave staff, I expect that they will produce superior translations. Jade Cocoon will be the acid test, naturally, but I've got faith. Bear in mind that, to my knowledge, Ted Woolsey was never involved in their translation projects in the first place, and would not have impacted their quality in any event. He was part of the Craveyard team, and took his lumps as one. Whatever the quality of Crave's translations, the closing of Craveyard won't impact them. As an aside, I think it's a damn shame that Craveyard was shut down, and I sincerely wish all involved the best of luck in whatever they do next. I really would've liked to see them grow. They were something unique in the gaming market, a US-based company with a taste for RPGs, and it's a damn shame any potential has been stopped. | Why not Game Boy? | Why do you think more companies don't develop RPGs for the game boy? It'sa pretty simple forum to work with, and lends itself well to games that aretext-heavy and don't require pretty graphics, or a lot of buttons. I lovemy GB, but I just wish it had more RPG support. -- Nich Maragos |
Well, with the smash success of Pocket Monsters, we've seen quite an unsurge of Game Boy RPG development (Dragon Quest Monsters and Lufia: Ruins Chasers spring to mind). I think the problem with developing for the Game Boy is that it's not a powerful processor, and has small storage space. There's less freedom to play around with new technology, which many developers are keen to do. Not just in terms of beefing up the game with FMV clips and gorgeous graphics, but forays into non-linearity, or very complex combat systems like Tactics Ogre and the like, often require more oomph than the GB can provide. On the flipside, developing for the GB forces developers to do more with less, and that can have great and innovative results: again, look at Pokemon. But by and large, it's easier to experiment with a wider canvas. And that seems to be what many developers are looking for in a platform. | Lies, damn lies, and statistics | Allan, This message is in reply to Brad Williams's message. He stated thatWorking Designs lied to EB and Babbages' corporate offices when they saidLUNAR would ship on last Wednesday. To clear up the matter, let me say that WD was -lied to-. Theirproduction company said they would have enough copies prepared to fill inall of the orders by then, when in fact, the production company overshot theamount of copies they could prepare in a day by over 100%. When WD found outabout this, it was too late to do anything about it to get it shipped byWednesday. After that incident, WD had someone go to the company and overseethe rest of the work, ensuring it would be done ASAP. WD doesn't "lie" intentionally. They do what they can. Come on, it isn'tthat big of a deal. And why do people only notice WD's delays? Let me take another companyfor example. Say, Konami. Their website originally said Fall 1998 forSuikoden II's release date. Since then it has been delayed a large number oftimes, and is now scheduled for August/September 1999. That's almost a yeardelay. LUNAR took 10 months after it was announced in June. That's not allthat bad considering the changes. WD doesn't lie. They use their best judgement to when they can finishthe job. If it isn't done then, they'll continue working on it. I wishpeople would quit complaining about WD's delays. You should expect them bynow, and you should also know that the game will be worth the wait. Delaysare temporary, mediocrity is forever, as Vic states..and he's right. Whocares if the damn game is delayed, it'll come eventually - and with WD atthe wheel, it'll be worth it. Accept it, delays are a part of life. Give WDa break, people. Wandering Prophet |
I suspect that the Magic Knight Rayearth debacle has left a bitter taste in the mouths of some fans, which could account why Lunar's progress has undergone more scrutiny. More to the point, we're in a fairly small arena here, the RPG industry, and Lunar has become a big deal. It's been hyped more than any other non-Square RPG in recent memory, and with attention comes expectation. Asking for people to leave WD be, and just accept the delays, is probably futile. My advice is just to smile, laugh a little, and be patient. Giving orders doesn't work. In any event, Working Designs wants fans, not apologists. If you want to complain, go to it. If you're sick of it, stop listening. It's a stupid thing to get in a fight about. Let it go. | My dad can beat up your dad | My dad can beat up your dad! He's a Judo master, and killed and ate the Taco Bell dog! - Nathan Sanders |
Oh, he can, can he? Well, I have something you don't. I have the Force on my side. Yoda 3:16, Nathan me boy. Fear leads to hate. Hate leads to anger. And anger leads to ASS KICKING! | Copyright notices | After the copyrights of games run out, I think it is 75 years, and thecompany doesnt't re-new it, or isn't there to re-new it, would it belegal then to create roms of those games? If this is true, then lets see.....maybe another 50-60 years to playsome of those old obsolete games out there. Yipee! - Jason Cheung |
Heh. Yes, if the copyright for the game expires, it will indeed join the public domain. After many, many decades. Yoiks. We're likely to see the companies in question go under, making their product effective public domain, before the trademarks lapse. | The people have spoken | I think AndyR should be beaten with a stick. A stick with spikes. Cause he's stupid. I think Andrea does a very nice job with the fan art section and she should be able to put what she damn well pleases on it. It's her section. That's all I've got to say. -??? |
There was also a letter from Rumor that expressed this opinion. But, I had to shunt his letter into another file in the interests of keeping the core column brief. It's funny, accurate stuff, though. By the way, my preferred method for making disagreements known are bamboo splints under the fingernails, rather than sticks with spikes. Gives pain a sort of palm beach feel. | The crazies | Dear Allan, I have just come up with a brainstorm of an idea. Hit like lightning it did.....why not have a contest each week for the craziest, zaniest, wacked-out piece of crap that ever dared to rear its ugly head upon the earth? In short, a letter contest! Yeah, i can see it now....a new section, "The Weirdo Hall Of Fame" You wouldn't have to give prizes, just maybe say our names a lot and give us ego boosts, and then we can show off how totally insane we are. YIPPIE! - The Letter Writer Formerly Known As Kevin Strange |
Intriguing idea. You'd receive some sort of lifetime achievement award, Kevin, for remaining amusingly insane and sometimes incoherent for the past... six months? Six and a half? Still, I don't think I'll make it a contest. I'll just select a letter from the week's pull, and grant them the Looney Du Jour award. Fair? Or is this a really stupid idea? | J-Gaming and me | Hey there DA. I've always appreciated your column, it's one of those few places where serious RPG discussion occurs. And here's my attempt to introduce a new topic: J-Gaming. And other topics as well. Sure, this is a long letter, but please bear with this.. the ride is worth it. Today I'm going to present you with a tale of a game.. a game so brilliant in some ways and yet so poor in others that its esoterism was predetermined.. A game called Beruda Seruba Senkei, or Record of Beruda Seruba War, made by Tenki and published by Sony. I was fortunate to come into contact with this during my brief 'Japanese RPG-fanaticism phase' brought on by playing FFVII in Japanese. Briefly, it's a flight-sim RPG. That is, where sword-fights and magic battles would be in most 'straight' RPGs, there's WWI-style dog-fights. And dog-fights of such graphic excellence, they weren't parallelled until Gran Turismo. Complete with an *excellent* storyline (okay not quite Xenogears quality, but definitely better than the tepid Legend of Legaia one), it tells the story of an interplanetary explorer, Miyaki, who becomes trapped on an alien planet, after his spacecraft malfunctions (all introduced through a splendid introduction anime scene). The planet is divided by a war between the Noypesk Kingdom and the Gidan Empire, both the largely dominating forces of the world. This is due to the fact that the aforementioned kingdoms ensured their safety from ground assault by raising huge chunks of land in the air a la Granstream Saga/Soda Fountain, so the air force is all that counts (also introduced in a stunning anime cinema). When this mysterious astronaut lands, he is forced into this war, and fights for the Noypesk Kingdom. The ensuing conflict forces Miyaki to face his own fears, and save those he loves...... The dogfights were heaps of fun, but the best aspect about it was it was 2-Player. That's right! One guy took care of the piloting, the other took care of the shooting, a la Millenium Falcom in SW ep.4. Include a variety of airships with wild and interesting designs, the ability to have multiple characters (by the end, my airship was a gun-boat with no less than 14 turrets, each controlled by a different character. Sure, no maneuverability, but boy did it pack a punch.), and reasonably strong AI, and you have varied and interesting battles. So why was it poor in some parts? Because of *horrid* 2D out-of-battle graphics. We're talking eye-flinching here, all clashing bright colours and ill-drawn sprites, against bland backdrops and uninspired props. And the music in the game itself was also quite bad. These detracted from the game so much that it's no wonder it's not remembered. No, not a skerrick of mention anywhere on the internet. If I didn't have the game in front of me, I would doubt its existence... So that is my presentation of a J-Game - in fact, it is probably a classic example of this. Esoteric enough that it's doomed to obscurity and will almost certainly never be translated, yet excellent enough that it was memorable. As an RPG it shall always have a place in my heart, but as a game, it will always remain as a remnant of a short period in my life where I purchased Granstream Saga, Atelier Marie and this, all because I was touched so much by the incredible magic that was FF7 when it was released in Japan. And yes, in case you're curious, despite having flight-sim battles instead of hack-and-cast, I still deem Beruda Seruba Senkei an RPG, because you *play* the role of a character in a typical linear and *long* storyline. But that is a definition that remains long in debate, and always will... 1. So, are you familiar with J-Gaming? Ever tried to play through a game in Japanese? I'm sure you've probably done the FF5 endural (but a pleasurable one, I might add..), as you seem like the gaming type.. And you might have played Dragonquest Monsters, another *excellent* Japanese game for gameboy, and it beats the proverbial brown stuff outta Pocket Monsters.. 2. But there is one tune in Beruda Seruba Senkei that will *always* stick in my mind. And this is the real reason for my diatribe. The title song. No J-Game song comes close to this, even the Deen ToD opening song. But it's nowhere. No soundtrack, not a skerrick of mention of even the name on the internet *anywhere*. Yes, not even on SCEJ's website. And I want it. I want it sooo bad it hurts. Now I know you can record music from the Playstation *somehow*. Amber across at RPGStuff did it for the FFVII Demo Prelude. And of course, there's the famous Chocobo Range FFVIII battle music MP3. So how? How's it done? 3. Another thing, I played through Granstream Saga in Japanese at the same time. And in the Japanese version, there's a anime cut-scene where umm.. the pirate girl... (sorry that game is so forgettable) meets the hero for the first time. In case you don't know.. basically the RPG Hero is trapped in a freight box. When he opens the box, he realises that this girl's taking a shower. THQ, tactfully, cut certain parts out, because in the J-version, (and this'll get your blood racing!) we see her topless! Yep, that's right.. in a video game! No wonder THQ decided to cut it ('oh dear, some breasts! Oh no, all the american gamers would be all hot and bothered about that!'). Yes, even in video games, gratuitious shower scenes *do* exist! So what do you think? Do you think THQ stands in a justifiable position, cutting some material for the American market, for so-called 'cultural differences'? I'm not certain, myself... I for example, think 'dating' games are enjoyable, but I do agree that cultural differences do restrict their application to the American gaming market - do you have an opinion on this matter? From yasha.. who thought TGS's ending sucked. (the bad guy's voice at the end was as bad as the bad guy's voice in Lunar:EB for Sega CD... and that's saying something.) PS... Marie from Atelier Marie is a babe......... (yup, another obscure Japanese RPG) |
Whew. Quite a mouthful, but it raises some interesting points. And yes, Marie is a babe, as fictional characters go. I'm not sure what admitting as much says about me, but there we go. First off, I've done quite a bit of J-Gaming. I've played Star Ocean, Tales of Phantasia, Front Mission, FFV, Seiken Densetsu 3, all three Romancing Sagas, Bahamut Lagoon, DQ V and VI plus the remixes, Ys IV for PC Engine, and that's just the tip of the iceberg. Some with play-by-play translations, some with walkthroughs, some just with intuition and dedication. The experience makes you pay more attention to the gameplay, and I find that the best games draw you in with great, entrancing gameplay, regardless of whether you understand the plot at the time. As for recording video game music, I suspect they do it in much the same way as people pirate VHS tapes - play it, and record what's being displayed, as opposed to recording directly off the original. Anyone who's actually recorded gaming music, please supply a more detailed explanation. Lastly, I think there are some elements of Japanese games that don't cross the culture gap terribly well, and in truth, most of them would probably be more trouble than they're worth. Nippleage in a shower scene is common in Japan, but in the US, it's the difference between a K-A and an M rating. Do most Americans, Canadians, or anyone in Europe for that matter, have the fondness for young girls in short uniforms that populate a frightening number of Japanese games? Hell, what the hell would US gamers do with games like the Tengai Makyou series, which are full of injokes and cultural references germane to Japan. I'm not saying we should ban all Japanese games or anything silly like that, but realistically, I think there's a point where localizers have to say "okay, that's more trouble than it's worth" and blur out the nipples during the shower scene. Or decide that TokiMemo probably won't sell in the US. It's just a different culture and a different market, and beyond any value judgement, some elements of games just won't cross the gap well. If you really feel you're missing out, you can petition smaller companies to bring over the quirkier titles, but honestly, I think multiculturalism has its limits, and they lie somewhere between low hemlines on sailor suits and Chatting Parodius: Forever With You. Closing Comments We add a disclaimer, and the whole column reads just the same. It just has a big rant at the start. Heh. Sound and fury, signifying nothing, I guess. But for the safety of GIA, and the relief of our lawyers, it's staying right where it is. You never know when I might go over the edge. :) Oh, and if any of you haven't cleared your caches recently, could you PLEASE check for Saturday's DA entry? Drew accidentally lost it, and it'd be a shame to lost a column entirely. Can you help? Will you save a child? - Allan Milligan | | | |
