Doot. Another day, another batch of letters, another column. I really don't have any witty commentary or a topic to rant about tonight, so I'll just get on with it. | Paging Mr. Swift, paging Mr. Swift | Concerning the February 15th letter on Sephiroth's 'obscure appeal' -- Give me a break. Girls, in general, do not care whether or notSephiroth is an evil fiend or a Nobel Prize winner. Tell me, what hasLara Croft done for you lately? We like Sephiroth for the same reasonyou guys like Tifa: he is scantily clad and has a nice bod. Every gamehas cute girls to appease male hormones; why can't /we/ have somefun? Female gamers have long since gotten used to jiggling femalecharacters, enemies and heroines alike. When /we/ complain, we arelabeled feminazis. For every girl who dumped their boyfriend lookingfor someone to burn down her home town (not always a bad thing, youknow), there are ten guys who dumped their girlfriends looking forsomeone's whose boobs bounce when they breath. ~~NekoLeo |
You have a valid point, madam. I certainly wouldn't label you, or anyone else a feminazi. I have no problem with having some attractive males in gaming. Hell, I think there should be more - it might help broaden the appeal of the industry, and thereby banish the annoying-but-true "boy's club" atmosphere video gaming has. I don't condone what Eidos has done with Lara Croft, much less the Dead or Alive debacle, but hell, if objectifying and exploiting sex in gaming works, we might as well use it both ways.
I should, however, point out that the original letter which set you off was, in fact, a joke. I can understand that this is a sensitive subject, but come on, the letter ended with the suggestion that he should become a mass murderer in order to score with women, because it worked for Sephiroth. This is sarcasm. This is not serious. Relax. Please, everyone, when you respond to a letter in this column, make sure you read it first. | A bridge too far | Howdy. I wish to discuss a very important issue, one which has weighed heavily on my mind as well as on yours, I am sure. I am referring, of course, to The Bridge Debate. Some have suggested that bridges are signs of women's evil wrath, such as the bridge in FFVI. This may be true, but I think bridges also signify something far deeper, something closer to our very beings. Yes, bridges symbolize a deep psychological struggle, as seen in Xenogears at that bridge in the underwater city. The bridge obviously is a symbol of Fei's struggle between his personalities and the schizm (ooh, cool word) between them. And the observant gamer will also notice that Id looks surprisingly female, showing that it does also contain an aspect of women's evil wrath. But I think we need to look deeper to find the true, whole symbolism that Square was trying to give us. -Arpad Korossy |
Bridges in RPGs generally represent paths to greater challenges throughout the game. The easiest example is the Dragon Warrior bridge - you cross one, you encounter more powerful enemies. They represent a hurdle to cross, a step towards the future. I've never seen it suggested that a bridge represents women's wrath, and frankly find it pretty absurd. Struggle, sure, I guess, but wrath? How does that work? I really don't see it. Man oh man, what IS it with gender issues today? | Slice and dice | Oh Wise and Learned Sir, I am an avid collector of weaponry. And since you are a double agentI would appreciate your feedback on a few questions. If I wanted tokill someone I'd have to choose a weapon. I'd use a gun, except Ican't find a silencer and it'd be too loud. With that in mind, let'sexamine swords. I could use my swordcane; easily mistaken for aregular cane so I'd need no concealment. Also, I could use a Samuraisword. The blade is about 3 feet long, and the sharpness and reachare superior to the cane. Next, there's the Scottish Single-Handsword. It has a blade about 4 feet long and is double edged. Thelength would make for harder concealment. Moving on to the war axe. This weapon is only about 36 inches long total, and the blade couldtake a head off. While the spike on the back could puncture almostanything. Additionally, other than traditional knives, I have aprotractor style knife with a half-circle blade. I could slit athroat easily with it. But I also have to take into consideration mytraining weapons. I could use the 6' bo staff and take out thewindpipe, larynx, etc. Or I could use a tonfa (the T-style billyclubs used by cops) and beat them down. Also, there's the kendotraining sword for beating. My options are somewhat limited, and timeis of the essence. Please help me out, keep in mind that I could justuse my body as well. Inquiring minds would like to know if you preferapples to potatoes. |
... um, I prefer apples. Anyhow, despite the secret agent-type styling of this site, I do NOT condone violence in ay way, shape, or form. I don't think you should kill anyone, period. Not with a sword, not with a gun, not with a staff or a rubber chicken. Not in a boat, not with a stoat, not anyplace or anyway. | A cry for help | You MUST post this! I've tried everything else, this is my last hope!I'm looking for a game called Dark Designs, made in 1990 by John Carmack, and released on something called Big Blue Disk #52. I used to play it on my old 386 and loved it, this was the first RPG I had ever played. Unfortunately, I lost it when my hard drive crashed. So...if you would be nice enough to post this, along with my E-mail address, I would be eternally in your debt! =) - Marquis Elmdor p.s. PLEASE?? I'll give you anything, ANYTHING! FF3? Done! Smuggled nuclear warheads? You got it! |
The Marquis' email address is seph4@hotmail.com. Anyone that can help him out (I can't), please do so. BTW, there will be no shameless plugs or sales requests for the rest of the week. I don't want this to turn into a trend. | Preorders | I was reading the news section and you said ff8 sold over 2 million preorders, which was more than ff7's 1million or so. But a while back you said that Zelda's (way too over hyped game) preorders of 500,000 was a record. Didi I miss something? Dan Chruscinski |
FF8's preorders are indeed a record, for the PSX in Japan. Zelda: TOoT's preorders, though less than FF8's by a good margin, were the highest preorders in the US market ever, and the highest ones for an N64 game. | Bub and Bob | Hey Double Agent You guys are great. When I see games like Dragon Warrior and Wild Arms in the vault, it sort of makes me want to cringe. In my opinion, they were both god-awful games (sorry Fritz), but my faith has been rekindled as I saw the words "BUBBLE BOBBLE" flash onto my screen when I entered GIA today. Besides being a really cool game, it was obviously made be either two, small, pre-school children who didn't have a clue in the world what they were doing, or two Japanese guys smoking crack cocaine. Either way, that's pretty cool. I'm still trying to figure out the logic of Bubble Bobble, though. I mean, how did Super Drunk get the powers to turn Bubby and Bobby into Bubble Dinosaurs? I don't think being a drunk-ass-cute-bum-type-thing justifies you sacred supernatural powers of being able to turn people into cute little dinosaurs who blow bubbles. I'm also trying to figure out how the bloody hell the game taught me about love and friendship and stuff. Sitting down for an hour and a half to play a Nintendo game really didn't teach me that much, besides the fact that it doesn't take much to entertain me. It's also best to steer away from Bubble Bobble's sister game, "The Snow Bros." It's like Bubble Bobble, but uh, not fun. I guess cute little dinosaurs that shoot bubbles from their mouths and can jump through floors are more appealing than cute little snow men that fire snowballs from their body and uh... can jump through floors. Or something. Nice 1P, -Sak |
Oh, lord, Snow Bros. What a putrid little game that was. It's like the developers went "hey, I know, let's make a game that plays a bit like Bubble Bobble, but with crap control, graphics, and the general appeal of a disease-infested corpse!" And they made it. Anyhow, glad you liked seeing the Bubble Bobble Vault entry. It's a personal fave, and a good write-up. Thumbs up from the Agent. | Is it? Well, maybe | .....this is a short, simple, and probably 1000+ times-already-askedquestion (did that make sense? ...naw) But I must know! What chance does the FF Collection have in coming to America? I've heard ithas a GREAT chance from some places, and a TERRIBLY or NON-EXISTENT chancefrom other places. Knowing Square, I doubt it will come here....but I'm hoping and praying! The Wandering Prophet |
No official word on a US release for the FF Collection. In my opinion, I don't think it stands much of a chance of getting brought over, but that's sheer speculation on my part.
Closing comments Depending on how tonight's letters batch comes along, we might or might not have some further letters about sex appeal in gaming posted tomorrow. Oddly enough, this caught more responses than any other topic for the day. Didn't think it was such a hot topic, to be honest. Ah well. We'll see what you've got to say tonight, then. Ciao. - The Double Agent | | | |
