Arrest Report

[02.23.02] » by Rip Coyne

Police arrive at the "Fantasy Flowers" subdivision to investigate a suspicious persons call. Upon arrival police notice a young man in a worn out purple body suit. Police officer Sgt. Riggs recognizes this man as Thomas Eugene Berkley, but uses the street name "Cloud" or "Strife". "This poor guy again." Stated Sgt. Riggs. "Just about every time we get a suspicious persons or vagrancy call, it'll be this guy." Since technically no crime has been committed, officers escort Berkley off the subdivision property. "Apparently he was some big shot in a movie or something" continues Sgt. Riggs. "But as well received as he was, he never stared in anything else."

"I was in Ergiehz!" shouted Berkley before soiling himself and wandering off. Berkley was later arrested for urinating in public in front of the "Fantasy Island" tanning salon.