Master

[07.06.00] » by Nightsong

            What am I?  I am… nothing.  I can barely even think any more.  I used to be normal.  I owned a store.  I was engaged.  Why did I give that up?  I gave it all up for a black cloak and a vision of a warrior.  Beyond a warrior.  A master.  The vision bade me come, and I must come.  I left my home without a word to any.  Just threw on this shroud and started walking.  I have no supplies.  No food, no shelter.  Just these visions.

            I have come to the northlands in search of him.  The master of my visions.  There are others like me.  They do not speak.  I do not speak.  We forever march on.  Why are we doing this?  What drives us?  I cannot ask the question.  All I can do is walk.  One foot in front of the other… to darkness.

            I'm not hungry.  I should be.  It has been months since I left.  Why haven't my friends come after me?  What of my fiancee?  I had a life before this!  Now there is only the master.  Why do I not hunger?  Why don't I stop?  I want to.  I can't.  I can't stop.  The master bids me onward.  I can't disobey.  I have no will.

            I am a puppet.  My strings have been tugged, and I am pulled to the master.  Why can't I stop.  I am tired.  I don't wish to be here.  The cold… I have entered a monstrous crater.  It swallows up my hopes and dreams.  Monsters surround me.  I'm scared.  Let me run away.  Please.  I can't run.  I continue, deeper into the darkness.

            There are people with me.  Who were they?  What did they give up?  Do they want to run from here?  What has happened to us?  I wish I could curse the master, scream horrible things and spit in his face.  I can't.  All I can do is march, his voice beckoning me onward.  The voice… who is he?  He's almost like a part of me.  It's as though I'm him… or is he me?  But that can't be right.  I am an individual.  I had a life.  I had friends, a family, a woman who loved me.  I was.  All of that is gone now.  There is only the march.  I would give anything to go back.

At least it will be over soon.  I can see where the master beckons now.  A cliff.  His will, my will, is to leap from it, to be swallowed up by the intermingling light and darkness.  The lifestream… and the jagged rocks that I will fall upon.  All of this, for his glory.  Why?  I don't want to die.  Please, I don't want to fall.  Such a long way down.  I can't stop walking.  I can't stop.

I had a life, but it has been taken. 

I had a voice, but I am muted.

I had a will, but it has been bent.

I had it all, but it was always his.

It's clear now.  As I prepare for the fall, it is made clear.  I am nothing.  A clone of the master.  Made in his image to die in his image.  Why?  For his glory.  But I had a life, I did.  No no no, don't want to fall.  Stop walking.  Stop stop stop!!  I can't stop.  One foot over the edge.  The other follows all to quickly.  The air whipping around me.  I want to scream.  I can't.  Even now, he is my will.  The ground nears me.  It's going to hurt.  I wish I'd gotten married.  I wish I'd told my family I love them.  I was close to a perfect life.  I took it for granted.  But now, I am noth-