Final Fantasy 7 Meets Final Fantasy 8 (and Tifa wins whole bunch of Triple Triad Cards)

[03.09.00] » by Alicia Hutchinson

Cloud: "You say your materia is useless, Aeris? I don't think so. Let me see." (sticks materia in sword slot anyway. Materia promptly glows. Glowing rift abruptly opens in sky. Squall falls out of it.)

Squall: "Owch." (stands up) "This doesn't look like the flower field I was supposed to find Rinoa in...ahhhh!"

Squall (staring at Cloud thinking to himself): -Funny looking man. What's with that hair...and the angles?! Doesn't look very realistic to me...-

Cloud thinking: -The &^%$?! Some new illusion of Sephiroth's?!- (draws sword)

Squall: -...Whatever...- (draws gunblade)

Cloud: "....."

Squall: "....."

Cloud: ".........."

Squall: "........."

Cloud: "..........say something why don't you?!"

Squall: ".........where am I?"

Cloud (angry): "Don't play dumb!"

Squall (very angry): "Who's playing dumb?! I don't know where I am!!"

Cloud (very very angry): "You wanna fight? You wanna fight? FINE!!!" (jumps Squall. Fight ensues as rest of FF7 cast look on in confusion)

(Rift opens back up a few minutes later. Rinoa gracefully glides out of it.)

Rinoa: "Squall...? What in the world?" (turns to Tifa) "Might I ask what happened?"

Tifa explains.

Rinoa sighs and shakes her head, hand clasped to forehead. : "I told him we should have stopped for directions on the way home, but noooooo, he insists that he knows where he's going...."

Later

Cloud: "CROSS SLASH!!!"

Squall: "FATED CIRCLE!!!"

Aeris (yawn): "How long do you think they can keep this up?"

Riona (sleepily): "I don't know. Until one of them gives up, I guess." (perks up a little) "Anybody want to play a card game we play in our world?"

Cid: "Your boyfriend and Cloud are over there trying to murder each other, and you want to play cards? What the %*&^$?! No!!"

Rinoa, coaxingly: "You know, our Cid would play cards with me...."

Cid: ".....Oh, ^%&^%*&. Fine then. How do you play?"

Even Later

Cloud: "FINISHING TOUCH!!!"

Squall: "BLASTING ZONE!!!"

Yuffie: "I win I win! Gimme that card." (snatches a card out of Cid's hand) "Seifer? Who the heck is Seifer?"

Cid: "Hey...you put that card down upside down! That's a six, not a nine! Gimme that!" (snatches card back)

Even Later Later

Cloud: "OMNISLASH!!!!"

Squall: "LIONHEART!!!!"

Tifa: "Looks like I win again." (beams at everyone) "Hand it over."

Rinoa, sighing: "All right...geez, you're lucky. How do you win so much?"

Cait Sith: "She owns a bar, y'know..."

Rinoa: "Great. Just my luck to play cards with a cardshark..."

Even Later later later

Cloud, weakly: "Ugggg...b...b...b...Br...Braver..."

Squall, weakly: "uhhhh....R..rr...rrough D...d...divide..."

Tifa: "You boys can stop now. I've got all their cards."

Cloud and Squall: "uhhhhh...."

Simultaneous faint.

Aeris: "Who do you think won?"

Barret: "....Tifa."

Tifa, brightly: "Who, me?"