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Chapter ThirtyNine Time passed excrutiatingly slowly over the next days and weeks for Kit, as it always does when someone is awaiting something. AVALANCHE was kept busy thwarting the attempts of Shinra to take control of the rest of the Huge Materia, and though Kit was as anxious as anyone to ensure Shinra's failure, she couldn't help but feel it was all pointless. Shinra, AVALANCHE, materia - what really mattered was stopping Meteor, and it seemed no one could do it. Her hopes were raised a bit when they discovered Shinra's best plan, using Cid's rocket as a missile to blow the Meteor apart, but even that failed. It made no sense - the explosion should have been enough to blow that giant ball of rock apart, but yet it still hung in the sky as ever, now with a crater in the side, as if flaunting its invulnerability. Kit wondered if it was due to Sephiroth's own unwavering will power.
She was beginning to think no one could stop the Meteor except by Sephiroth's choice. And if only she could get to him, if only she could reach him somehow... But no matter how many times she closed her eyes, willing him to hear her voice across the distance, assuring him she would come, she felt less of an effect than the rocket had had on Meteor. Not so much as a dent. But she kept trying... she had to. She was likely the only person who could make him think twice.
Or so she thought, until an unexpected idea had come to Cloud. And with that idea had come an unexpected encounter.
They'd gone to see Bugenhagen at Cosmo Canyon after recovering the Huge Materia from the rocket, and the wise old man had asked them to look into their hearts, to look at what their very instincts were trying to tell them.
"I remember Aeris a lot," Cloud had finally said. "No..." he added quickly, thinking to himself out loud. "not that. You haven't remembered. You haven't forgotten. That's not it... How would you say it..." He'd paused, searching for the right words. "Aeris was right there all along. Right by our side. She was so close, we couldn't see her. What Aeris did... the words she left behind..."
Tifa had nodded, a look of peace crossing her face as she looked over to Cloud. "That reminds me... I was the same." The others had agreed, Aeris was in all of their thoughts.
She was in Kit's as well, but for her, the memory of the flower girl brought more guilt and confusion than grief. That single act had, far more than Meteor, shaken her belief that Sephiroth could be saved. Could she love a man who had done such a horrible thing? What kind of person was she, that she didn't want to punish him for it? She didn't even understand why he had done it. Meteor at least made sense, albeit in a sick way - to take the Lifestream for himself and Jenova, he would cause a fatal wound to the planet. But what point had there been in the death of a kind young woman, despite her unique heritage?
That question was answered when they returned with Bugenhagen to the City of the Ancients. The old man was sensitive to the planet, and somehow seemed to be able to discern things from the lifeblood of the planet, as thick as it was there, deciphering the knowledge of the long-dead Ancients that had once inhabited the area. Upon entering, he immediately was drawn to a crystalline prism in the center of one cavern.
"This is... Yes... exactly..." he murmured, regarding it with interest as he approached it cautiously.
"Are you getting something?" Cloud asked.
Bugenhagen didn't answer for a moment, still examining the crystal. "...Give me a moment," he replied finally.
When the others had reached the crystal, he nodded vaguely. "The knowledge of the Ancients swirling around here is telling me one thing. The planet's in a crisis... A crisis beyond human power or endless time." He hesitated again, concentrating. "It says, when the time comes, we must search for 'Holy'."
"Holy?" Cloud asked, voicing the confusion in everyone's mind.
"Holy... the ultimate White Magic," Bugenhagen answered him. "Magic that might stand against Meteor. Perhaps our last hope to save the planet from Meteor."
Kit felt herself beginning to smile. So there was a hope after all, perhaps, other than changing Sephiroth's mind or stopping him by force. She wasn't entirely sure how much it would take to do the former, and she didn't like the latter option in the slightest - if in fact it could even be done.
"If a soul seeking Holy reaches the planet, it will appear," Bugenhagen continued, apparently as cheered by the thought as the rest of them were. "Ho ho hooo," he chortled. "Meteor, Weapon, everything will disappear." He leaned towards Cloud, lowering his voice. "Perhaps even ourselves."
Cloud's eyes widened. "Even us?!" he exclaimed, confused.
"It is up to the planet to decide," Bugenhagen answered, using his strange hovering mechanism to float higher above them. "What is best for the planet. What is bad for the planet," he mused. "All that is bad will disappear. That is all. Ho ho hooo.... I wonder which we humans are?"
At the moment, probably humans were doing the planet more harm than good, Kit thought. Barret had explained early on how the Mako reactors were more or less sucking the planet's blood when it came down to it, and humanity acting as a parasite. But humans were a part of the planet, weren't they?
Cloud shrugged off the unusual question as if it were unimportant. It would be a moot point anyway, if the planet and everyone on it were to die, and he knew it. "Search for Holy... how do we do it?" he asked Bugenhagen.
"Speak to the planet," Bugenhagen answered. "Get the White Materia... This will bond the planet to humans," he finished, still seemingly half-listening to whatever it was he was hearing in the energy. "Then speak to the planet. If our wish reaches the planet, the White Materia will begin to glow a faint green."
Cloud's shoulders suddenly sagged, and his face fell. "...This is the end," he muttered with a shrug. "Aeris had the White Materia..."
She did? Kit was stunned. So that was why Sephiroth had murdered her... she really had had the ability to stop his plans. If Holy made what was bad for the planet disappear, Jenova certainly would have been at the top of that list.
And if they could get that White Materia... if they could use it to make Jenova disappear... Sephiroth would be just Sephiroth. He'd be the man who had been so confused that night by the river, and she would help him find his true identity, apart from his so-called "Mother"...
Her hopes were dashed by Cloud's next words. "But when Aeris died, it fell from the altar... That's why... this is the end."
Bugenhagen chuckled again, nervously, and peered around the crystal suddenly, as if looking for something. The Ancients must have given him some more instructions, for soon he chuckled again, more cheerfully. "Look at this!" he exclaimed, moving aside so the others could see. They leaned forward to examine it, and Kit could make out some faint marks on the stone. "Ancients' writing!" Bugenhagen explained.
"Can you read it?" Cloud asked.
"I can't even make it out!" Bugenhagen admitted.
The others all groaned. "This's no time for jokes," Cloud pointed out.
Bugenhagen shrugged. "I'm not an Ancient. I can't read this thing!" Peering at it a little harder, he suddenly smiled. "I may be old, but my eyes aren't completely bad yet. Look closely below the writing."
Cloud stared for a moment, then nodded slightly. "There's something written in chalk... 'even sunlight can't reach'... 'Key'..."
"It was probably written by a scientist who's been here," Bugenhagen commented. "He probably used all his energy to make out these two words," he added with a smirk. Very few could read the planet as easily as Bugenhagen could.
"Key...? To what?" Cloud asked him.
"I don't know... But, it probably has something to do with our riddle," he stated. "The riddle... then it must have something to do with Aeris."
"So this note points to where the key is?" Cloud asked.
"Probably," Bugenhagen agreed. "Use these words as clues and go find the key. I'll continue to figure out the Ancient's writing."
"A place 'even sunlight won't reach' is where the 'key' is, right?" Cloud mused.
"When you find the key, or when you can't go any further, come back here," Bugenhagen assured him. "Maybe I'll understand more from the writing and get some new information for you."
It had been Red who'd suggested that the key they were searching for might be somewhere deep in the ocean, and at Cid's suggestion, they took the submarine they'd stolen from Shinra earlier to search the undersea caves around the western continent. One narrow passageway looked promising, winding deep below the continent above, but ended in a round chamber through which sunlight shone down from above.
"Where are we?" Tifa asked. "It seemed like someone was leading us towards something..."
"Yeah, I thought this would be it for sure," Yuffie said weakly. "At least, I hoped... can we get off here for awhile?" she pleaded.
Cloud too admitted to feeling a little motion sick, and so he agreed to go up and get some fresh air before continuing the search. When the submarine surfaced, they found themselves to be in a circular lake fed by a waterfall, surrounded by tall mountains.
Yuffie was the first one out once they'd landed, professing eternal gratitude to Cloud for the respite, and the rest of them followed quickly - it was a gloriously sunny day, perfect for taking in the beautiful scenery, as the others noted. Most of them, anyway - when Vincent stepped out, he took a quick glance around, then sat down wordlessly by the water's edge and began to polish his gun without a second look. He just wasn't the type to appreciate natural beauty, Kit supposed.
That is, if it was natural at all. As Tifa had said, the passageway they'd taken did look as if it had been there for a reason. There was no sense in wasting any time, Cloud decided, so after a few minutes he asked if anyone else wanted to explore the area and try to find out if there was anything unusual about it. Kit and Barret were both feeling impatient, and chose to go along with him.
The waterfall caught their eye first, and as they drew closer, it became apparent that there was something behind it. "Looks like a cave," Barret said, nodding. "Maybe that's that place 'sunlight can't reach'."
Kit nodded. "Possible. The mouth of the cave faces south, so the sun would never shine into it, even if the waterfall weren't there," she agreed. Plus, there was an odd feeling about this place. Kind of like Nibelheim had felt the first time she arrived, but less oppressive.
"There's a lot of caves that face south," Cloud pointed out. "Too bad we don't have more to go by. There are probably hundreds of places sunlight can't get to in this world."
"Well then, we'll just have to check them as we find them, right?" Kit said with a shrug. Funny, Cloud was the one who'd not wanted to waste time, so why was he arguing? "Even if this isn't where the key is, I'll bet this cave holds some other secret."
Cloud nodded. "I guess so..." He reached over his shoulder to touch the hilt of his sword, almost appearing apprehensive.
Barret looked at him suspiciously. "What're you actin' like a coward for?"
"I'm not," Cloud said, suddenly determined. "Let's just go..."
He strode off towards the waterfall a little too quickly, and Barret and Kit followed. "What's his problem?" Barret growled.
"I don't know, but I feel something strange here too," Kit admitted as they ducked beneath the torrent of water. "The difference is, he seems to think it's a bad kind of strange, where to me it feels almost..." She paused to consider as they drew closer. "...Welcoming."
Barret snorted. "You're both strange. I don't feel nothin'."
His words brought a sudden idea to Kit's mind, and suddenly she felt apprehensive as well. What did she and Cloud have in common that Barret did not?
Jenova.
Of course! Cloud had never had anything but trouble thanks to Jenova, whereas the feel of Jenova was familiar to Kit, and in a way reminded her of Sephiroth.
Still, Kit recognized the danger, and would have called out to Cloud to wait for them, except that despite her realization, there was still a feeling of peace in this place. A little ways ahead, a pale blue light glowed, and beneath Kit's feet, the rough ground gave way to smoothly polished stones. She and Barret made their way towards Cloud, who was heading straight towards the light, when a soft voice echoed through the chamber.
"Vincent...?"
The three of them stepped into the light, looking around for the source of the voice, but saw nothing but an empty cavern. The glow they had seen seemed to emanate from some kind of crystalline altar, and illuminated a round chamber made entirely of blue stones. Kit felt strangely reassured that the voice had been unfamiliar. Even if the chamber did have Jenova's strange energy, the voice had not been hers.
"Who's there?" Cloud replied, glancing around. There was no response, and he shrugged. "What is this?" he wondered aloud.
"I don't know," Barret replied. Even he had lowered his voice upon entering. "But it sounds like some lady wants to talk to Vincent."
Cloud nodded, and turned to leave. "Let's go get him, then."
Kit glanced over her shoulder at the chamber one last time before following; she'd thought she heard a small sigh, but the chamber was still empty.
Going back to the spot by the lake where they'd left the submarine, they found that nearly everyone had wandered away to enjoy their time off. Vincent, however, was still sitting in the same place he'd been when they'd left. "Yo, Vincent," Barret called as they approached. "There's something you might want to check out."
Vincent didn't look up from his gun. "Like what?"
"We found a cave over there," Cloud informed him. "It looked empty, but... someone in there called your name."
He glanced up then, his hands freezing on the gun. "You don't sound as if you're joking," he noted.
"That's because we're not," Cloud affirmed. "When we entered, a woman called for Vincent. Do you know anything about this?"
Vincent's eyes grew suddenly sharp. "Less than I thought I knew, it appears," he replied as he replaced the gun in his holster and stood.
"So you'll come with us?" Kit asked him.
Vincent didn't reply, but merely looked off towards the waterfall. After a moment's hesitation, he strode off towards the waterfall, ignoring Cloud as he followed. Kit followed as well, curious.
Vincent ducked under the falling water without a pause, and his dark hair glistened with droplets of water as they made their way into the cave. It was as if he knew the place, Kit thought, but when she and Cloud caught up to him, a quick glance at his face showed him to be as stern and stoic as always. But then, at the edge of the light, he paused.
"...Vincent?" the same voice called, echoing off the shiny blue stone of the round chamber.
Vincent's usual steady posture vanished as he rushed forward, toward the crystalline altar that was the source of the light. "That voice?"
Kit and Cloud exchanged curious glances, then were startled by a sudden movement on the other side of the chamber. "It can't be..." Vincent whispered in disbelief, his eyes full of reverance. "Lucrecia...?"
Kit gasped as the form of a woman became visible within the pale light, kneeling inside it as if she was the source. Lucrecia... Sephiroth's real mother, her son's grandmother, and the woman Vincent had loved. Kit could sense that the Jenova energy was strong in Lucrecia, though the woman herself looked frail. She knelt inside the light, raising weary, frightened eyes to Vincent as she stood slowly, brushing her dark, disheveled hair over her shoulder. "Vincent...?"
"Lucrecia!" he exclaimed, running to her. But after only a single step, Lucrecia's eyes widened in fear behind her wire-rimmed glasses.
"Stay back!"
Vincent froze, but obeyed, staring at Lucrecia's face for long, long moments as if he were trying to memorize it. "Lucrecia..." he murmured finally. "You're alive..."
She lowered her eyes painfully. "I wanted to disappear... I couldn't be with anyone... I wanted to die... But the Jenova inside me wouldn't let me die."
So Vincent had been wrong... and Sephiroth had been right. She wouldn't die in childborth, Kit realized with relief. But then again, Kit could see the torment that living brought Lucrecia on her tired face - the torment of one who is never allowed to rest. Perhaps death would have been preferable to living a life consumed by the effort to fight Jenova's will... but at least Lucrecia was proof that it could be done.
"Lately, I dream a lot of Sephiroth," Lucrecia said softly, shaking her head. "My dear, dear child. Ever since he was born I never got to hold him, even once... Not even once. You can't call me his mother... That... is my sin..."
Kit wanted to comfort the woman, tell her that it was all right, that her child had known love at least once in his life, but she seemed to be heedless of the presence of others, speaking to Vincent alone. Vincent took a step forward again, his eyes full of the pain he shared with Lucrecia, but she looked up at him, terrified. "Back! Stay back!" she cried. He obeyed, and she settled down again with a sigh. "Vincent... Won't you please tell me?"
"...What?" he asked helplessly.
"If Sephiroth is still alive?" She bowed her head. "I heard that he died five years ago. But I see him in my dreams so often... And I know that physically, like myself, he can't die so easily." She looked back up at Vincent, pleading. "Please, Vincent, tell me......"
Vincent hesitated, apparently reluctant to tell Lucrecia what had happened. Kit couldn't blame him one bit, and her heart went out to him. It might crush the woman to learn that her beloved son had gone mad and was threatening the life of the entire planet, but she did have to be told, so she could understand. Maybe if she understood, she could help them, Kit thought suddenly. Maybe the love of his true mother would be enough to break the hold Jenova had on him - maybe it would show him how much better true love was, rather than the love of vengeance.
Seeing that Vincent wasn't answering, Cloud began to step forward self-consciously, but Vincent held up his hand, indicating for him to stop. "Lucrecia..." he said, raising his eyes to meet hers firmly, "Sephiroth is dead."
With that, he turned and walked out of the cave, Cloud following his lead. As they did, Lucrecia gave a strangled sob, and only Kit was watching, stricken, as her slight figure vanished in a flash of light.
Kit couldn't remain silent anymore. "Lucrecia!" she called. "Lucrecia? Please..." Her words echoed sharply in the chamber, which suddenly felt desolate and cold, devoid of even the Jenova energy she'd sensed before. Whatever Lucrecia had become, magical being or ghost, she was no longer present.
Suddenly Kit was overcome by rage. She spun and marched out of the cave, catching up to Vincent by the waterfall, where he'd paused as Cloud went on ahead. "Why did you say that to her?" she demanded. "How could you tell her such a thing?"
Vincent didn't bother looking back at her as he answered. "I've caused her enough pain."
"That's not true!" Kit exclaimed in frustration. "You said she and her husband agreed on those experiments - how could that be your fault? Even if you did cause her some pain in the past, she's his mother, Vincent! She cares about him, and she deserves to know the truth."
"Soon enough, it will be the truth."
Kit stared at him in disbelief. "Of all the people I expected to hear that from... So you're resigned to kill the son of the woman you loved? Just like that?"
"Sephiroth's fate was decided the moment he chose to summon Meteor."
"For crying out loud, Vincent - he's not the one responsible for this. He's a sick, confused man, and Jenova's manipulating him. If we can get back the White Materia, and use it to get rid of Jenova, he'll just be Sephiroth again, Lucrecia's son. He could have been your own son - would you give up on your own son so easily?"
"If he were my own son, nothing would be any different." Finally he turned back to her, and his red eyes were filled with torment despite his flat voice. "I would save him if I could, but I don't see how that will happen. Do you think it pleases me to tell dear Lucrecia that he's dead? Would it be better to tell her all the terrible things her son is responsible for? Would it be better to tell her that he's alive, and no more? She may have been happy for a time, but what of the day I would have to return to her, to tell her he was alive no longer - as if she wouldn't already have known." He turned away again. "If by some miracle he can be reclaimed, I will return to her and tell her. But until I can give her a happy ending, my sin grows ever greater."
"Vincent..." Kit had been taken aback by the pain in his eyes, an agony that had preyed on him ceaselessly for years. "Please believe me, there is no sin. Hojo punished you enough already, you don't need to punish yourself every waking moment. Nothing is that bad, and whatever happened back then, it's all in the past. It's over and done."
He looked back at her with the hint of an ironic smile on his lips. "The past has become the present, and it manifests as... that," he answered, looking to the north. The Meteor loomed large beyond the mountains, staining the blue skies red with its unholy energy. "If I'd done as I should have, Lucrecia could have raised her son as she wished, to teach him to value all human life. But I did not."
Kit just shook her head, almost speechless as her analytical mind came to an unusual conclusion. "You and Sephiroth have some important things in common," she pointed out. "Both of you define your worth by a single, external opinion, for one."
Vincent shrugged, and nonchalantly headed for the docked submarine once more, as if they'd been speaking of something of no real importance. "I hope there are few others," he commented.
Kit followed him wordlessly. They both were infuriatingly content in their neuroses as well, it appeared, but it would do no good to say anything more. She'd thought Vincent was the one person who might understand and agree with her viewpoint in the group - well, so much for that, she thought to herself. I guess it's up to me alone to save him, after all.
To Chapter Forty. To the intro. That means it's mine, not yours! |
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